


You Can’t Control A Heart

by The_Leader_Of_The_Resistance



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa Another Episode: Ultra Despair Girls
Genre: AU Haiji Towa, Alternate Universe, Bad Ending, Drama & Romance, Explicit Language, F/M, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-19
Updated: 2021-02-19
Packaged: 2021-03-16 09:08:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,539
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29573670
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Leader_Of_The_Resistance/pseuds/The_Leader_Of_The_Resistance
Summary: What if Haiji got what he wanted instead...with your help?
Relationships: Towa Haiji/Adult Reader





	You Can’t Control A Heart

**Author's Note:**

> I’ve had this idea in mind since I think December, and I’m so happy it’s finally here! Most of the story was revised to avoid making Haiji look like he’s manipulating the reader to get what he wants regardless of what she thinks. So why not make the reader just as bad as him but in a different way? 
> 
> Anyway, behold the bad ending for “This Isn’t The Only Way” that paints a darker outcome. ~~Toko and Kotoko fans, you have been warned.~~

##  ** You Can’t Control A Heart **

“Enough already, just hand over that controller!!” I slapped Toko with everything I had, knocking her straight to the floor. “I’ll crush it!”

You stood there, passively watching the scene. The little brat, the sister I once loved, watched with her emotionless emerald eyes while her pathetic pink friend shared your terror. And Komaru? Heh, let’s just say she was broken, on her knees, and unaware of what was happening.

Toko clutched the controller close. “I’ll...I’ll never...I’ll never hand it over!” 

Stupid bitch! I knelt on the floor and yanked her by the collar of her dress. “Do you want me to hurt you even more?!”

“Hurt? That means nothing to me. I’m sure you don’t understand since you have plenty of disposable friends, but...I finally made a friend in Komaru, and I’m not going to hurt my friend. So I’ll _never_ hand it over!”

My fury exploded right out of me. “Shut up!! In order to get the kids under control and end this nightmare, this is the only way!!!”

My fist collided with her face. Before I was aware of it, I started fighting her for the controller. I vaguely heard the pink-haired brat groaning, and caught a glimpse of you trying to restrain her.

“Let me go!” She kicked and screamed in your grasp.

“I won’t let you hurt him!”

 _Good girl._ I returned to the task at hand. Toko put up a good fight despite the blow, and it pissed me off the more she struggled.

“Fucking hell!” I pinned her to the floor with my knee “Hand it over!!” That controller was going to be mine, if she could just get her stupid hands off it! “Hand! It! Over!”

Too caught up in the adrenaline, I punched her again and again. I kept punching Toko’s obnoxious face, sick and tired of how annoying she had been since the very beginning. If trying to grab the controller from her wouldn’t work, then I’d have to beat her into submission. 

“NO!!” You restrained my arm as best as you could, preventing another punch. 

“What are you doing?!” I didn’t expect you to hurl yourself at me. 

“Stop it! You’re overdoing it!!”

“Stay out of this!!” I snarled at you.

You trembled at how I must have sounded like a wild beast. A rush of remorse crashed into me. It pained me to lash out at you like that, but I didn’t say anything. Despite the lingering fear lurking in your eyes, you stood your ground. 

“Haiji, listen to me! Just grab the controller!”

“Since when do you give a shit about who I beat up? She’s the one being unreasonable!” I tried to jerk away, but you squeezed my arm. “Let me go, damnit!!”

“Not if you’re going to beat her to death!”

“Don’t be an idiot! I’m not that heartless!”

“Just calm down!”

“Get off me!”

Trying to pry you off was like fighting against a fucking wrestler. But as I suspected, you were putting up a good fight. However, unlike with Four-Eyes, I was careful with you. My brute strength was reserved just for Toko and anyone else that got in the way.

“Damn it!” Frustration got the better of me. “What are you doing?! You’re supposed to help me!”

“Leave Toko out of this!” You clung on to me, refusing to get off.

“Oh, come on! You hate her guts too!”

That slowed your struggle, but you didn’t let go of me as I had expected. Fuck, what was with you all of a sudden?! 

During our personal dispute, Toko started crawling away. Shit! I was wasting time! Shoving you out of the way, I got back on my feet and hurried after her.

“Oh, no you don’t!” I stomped on that bitch’s back with everything I got. She stifled a cry that was so damn satisfying to hear.

“Haiji!” The warning tone in your voice fell on deaf ears. 

Toko’s strained groans filled the room. “Y-You don’t know what you’re doing, mole man...!”

I hissed at her through clenched teeth. “Shut up unless you don’t want to walk _ever_ again.” I increased the pressure on my foot for emphasis, her cries crystal clear.

“You’re insane!” The pink-haired brat shouted. “If you break the controller, you’ll kill every kid in this city!” 

I shot a glare at her. “I don’t care! You little assholes are responsible for the destruction of my city, so you’re all going to pay!” 

She dared to get close to me, but I immediately summoned my arm blade. “Back off!” The silver blade froze the brat in her tracks, paralyzed by fear. I smirked at her. “Come on. Where’s that brave face you had just now?” The perks of having a robotic arm instead of that stupid cast I used to have. No one could stop me now.

“Haiji, stop!” You pleaded, blocking her from me. “Please stop!”

“Why do you keep getting in the way? We both want to end this!”

“Not like this, you dumbass!” You snapped back at me.

“Babe, come on! You’re just as bloodthirsty as I am!”

“I-...” That seemed to strike something inside. It was true, wasn’t it? You wanted revenge too. That stunned both Toko and the brat, they stared at you in disbelief.

“We’re so close to ending this hell we’ve been living in for so long,” I continued, trying to get you to see reason. My arm blade switched back to my normal silver arm. “Did you forget what we’ve lost?”

“No,” you sighed, torn between anger and concern. “You know I haven’t.”

“Then what’s stopping you from wanting to break the controller at all costs? How can you be so against me right now? We’re a team!”

“She won’t do it!” Toko tried to endure the pain to look at you. “You won’t, will you? You’re someone from the mole man’s Resistance who still has more brain cells compared to him!”

A pang of rage shot through me, and I slammed my foot right on her back, making her scream. “Call me that one more time, and I swear to you I’ll break that spine of yours.”

Despite your initial protests, you didn’t lend Toko a helping hand. She squeaked, attempting to ignore the pain. 

“Wh-What are you doing?” She looked at you, pleading with that helpless expression of hers. You didn’t move. As I expected from you. “Help...!”

“Give. Me. The. Controller,” I growled at Toko, my tone growing aggressive with each word.

“N-...N-Never!”

My foot crushed her leg harder than I had imagined, I heard a bone crack. She wailed in agony, and her grip on the controller loosened.

You snatched it from her. “Haiji, I got the controller, so please stop,” you said through clenched teeth.

Oh, I wanted to keep going with the torture. The thrill of witnessing Toko, the annoying bitch that always managed to piss me off, quivering in horror and pain was too good to pass up. Wanting to punish her further, I grabbed a fistful of her hair and yanked it hard. She grimaced, barely making a sound.

I was so focused on tormenting her, I didn't notice her pulling out up some kind of taser until the last minute. “Shit!”

With a gasp, I was about to jump out of the way. Before the taser got any closer, you instinctively kicked her arm. The rough impact sent the taser flying and caused Toko to shriek.

“Y-Y-You-“ she whimpered, “You traitor...!!”

You panted heavily, glancing at me as if checking to see if I was alright. Another injury, another victory. I couldn’t be any more proud of you. 

My lips curled into a dark, satisfactory smirk as I leaned close to Toko’s ear. “Who’s the coward now?”

“ **Don’t** hurt her,” you repeated sharply. “She’s injured enough.”

“Why do you still care about her after what you just did?” I demanded, more confused with you than anything. 

“I-I did it to protect you. That’s different.”

“Tch. Yeah, right. You did it because she’s been nothing but a nuisance for both of us!” In a fit of rage, I drove a heel directly at Toko’s face, receiving another scream from her. Blood spilled from her lips. 

You winced at the sight. Instead of protesting more, you pushed me aside and rushed out of the room. 

“What the-?! Babe, wait!”

The pink-haired brat used my distraction to go after you. “We can’t let you-“

“Fuck off!!” I kicked the brat aside, critically injuring her as well. “This is between _me_ and _her_!” I chased after you, vaguely aware of Monaca’s haunting gaze watching me. “Wait! Come back!”

What were you thinking? You wanted to kill the kids as much as me, but now you were running away? Why the sudden change of heart? This couldn’t be happening. You were supposed to understand what this would mean for us! Our survival and freedom depended on breaking that controller. I couldn’t let you ruin this for both of us. Everyone was counting on us. _I_ was counting on you. We were so close to ending this senseless bloodshed, and you held the key to it all! This was the only way. And if it meant murdering every single kid, brainwashed or not, then so be it.

You dashed into a random room, but I was just as fast as you, maybe even faster. Before you could shut the door at my face, I managed to catch up to you and didn’t hesitate to barge into the room. 

Alarmed, you stepped away from me, hugging the controller. Determined to keep my cool, I drew in a deep breath and released it slowly. You weren’t my enemy. I locked the door behind me in case anyone dared to interfere.

“Babe,” I said, distraught by your reluctance. “You know I would never hurt you.” 

“I...I know you would never hurt me...but...you hurt Toko and-“

“Who the hell **cares** about that?” So much for keeping my cool. “You **shouldn’t** care about the people who are against us. The kids killed all of our loved ones, so we need to do whatever it takes to finish this. Don’t tell me you’re going to reconsider everything!”

“Haiji, don’t twist my words!” You rolled your eyes, losing your own temper. “I’m just as angry as you are, but-...but-...”

“...You don’t know what you’re doing.” I narrowed my eyes at you, but I regretted it when you looked like you might cry. “...Do you want to kill the kids or not?”

“H-...Haiji-“

“Stop.” The more vulnerable you looked, the more it made me forget about my anger. Guilt began to take shape. This wasn’t how it was supposed to go. If my temper was what terrified you, then I had to take responsibility for my behavior. 

“Babe...I’m sorry if I scared you out there.”

You didn’t answer. Soon streams of tears flowed across your cheeks. Fuck. For the first time since we got here, I felt like a total asshole.

“I’m sorry. Please...don’t cry.” I reached out to you, but you avoided my hand. Defeated, I lowered my arm. “Answer the question...Do you want to show those kids mercy after what they’ve done to us? What they’ve done to _you?_ ”

There was a flicker in your eyes. “I...I don’t know,” you said after a pause. “B-But this has nothing to do with me.”

“Are you sure about that? Those kids killed your own family. They killed all of your friends. You lost everything before your very eyes, just like everyone else in the Resistance.”

You winced, shuddering at the reminder. The tight grip on the controller caused your knuckles to turn white. “A-...And? I may have lost everything, but...but that doesn’t mean I’m willing to go that far like you. I hate those kids, I really do, but...I wouldn’t hurt anyone just to get what I want.”

“Not this again,” I sighed, exasperated.

“What?”

“You’re kidding me, right? You were hellbent on doing whatever it takes before we got here. I don’t get why you’re acting like this.”

Your gaze trembled, almost like you were going to cry again, but didn’t. Instead, your tears slowed, giving you a chance to wipe the moisture off your face.. “I-...I don’t know wh-what you’re talking about.”

The way you stammered said otherwise. You didn’t seem sure of anything at the moment. I clenched my fists, debating how I was going to handle this subject. It wasn’t going to be easy for me to do it, but I had to do it for you. 

“Can you prove it to me?” I said, calm but dead serious. “Can you prove to me that you don’t feel the same desire for revenge as me?”

You quivered, shaking your head as if you were in denial. Damn, it hurt to tell you the truth, but I had to make you face reality. You needed to face your true feelings. Revenge was something that you had been craving since day one.

“Think about it, _______.” I slowly took a few steps forward, real slowly to not push you away. You allowed me to close the distance. “Do you really believe sparing the kids is a good idea?”

“Of course not, Haiji. But isn’t there another way, like they said?”

“There isn’t, _______. Try to understand that. There’s no way to save those goddamn demons.”

“They’re brainwashed.”

“Their brainwashed state can’t be undone,” I said, placing my hands on your shoulders. “Try to hack into those stupid helmets, and they’ll just die anyway. No matter what, it’ll be the same outcome.”

Stubborn as you were, you clutched the controller. But despite your defiance, a sense of uncertainty crept to your face. You were conflicted deep inside, trying to discern what was the right decision to make.

You dropped your gaze, but your pensive expression didn’t escape me. “I don’t know what to do...”

“Yeah, you do, _______. You know what we have to do. We’ve discussed this. You get what I mean, don’t you?” I lifted your chin with a fingertip.

“H-Haiji, I...” Your voice trailed off as understanding began to materialize behind those lovely eyes I adored. “I do get what you mean. But do we have to be so ruthless to achieve our goal?”

“Babe...” My tone softened as I caressed your cheek. “Do _you_ want to stop this hell we’ve been living in for so long?”

“Yes,” you said with no delay.

“Then you know I had to be ruthless. We know what needs to be done, not just for us, but for the survivors, and Komaru and Toko will only prolong this living hell we’ve endured. Admit it, babe. You feel bitter. Angry.” My voice darkened. “Vengeful. Those kids took over our lives.”

You calmed yourself, processing my blunt response. The familiar darkness you possessed gradually emerged in your eyes. You had always known how you truly felt, and I couldn’t stand by and let yourself forget about what we’ve been fighting for all this time. I had to save you from yourself.

My lips grazed your cheek. “You know I’m right,” I whispered.

“I know.” The display of confidence in your words reassured me that you didn’t truly change your mind on anything. 

I snickered. “I must admit, I enjoyed how you broke Four-Eyes’ arm. I didn’t know you had it in you.” You blushed, trying to not smile but to no avail. It was cute to see your own dark side. 

“You were right. I did it because I hate her. She and that annoying demon tried to hurt you, and I couldn’t let them do that.”

“I can always count on you to save me,” I remarked. “Remember what we’re going to gain once this is over. Our home. Our lives. Our freedom. We’ll finally wake up from this nightmare. Isn’t that what you want? Do you want to avenge your loved ones? Do you want the kids to pay for taking them away from you?”

“More than anything,” you said with wicked determination.

My arms slithered around your body now that you were being your old self again. I kept giving your face soft, passionate kisses, but never claiming your mouth. 

You shuddered at how I kissed the corner of your lips. “Haiji...”

“Sparing the kids’ lives after they murdered your loved ones in cold blood was never what you wanted. I know you.” I held your chin with a tender grasp. “You want the same revenge as me...”

Deep down you truly wanted vengeance. When we first met, you were just as furious with those kids, but you weren’t always as intense like me. You wanted to do things without hurting anyone along the way, but now you knew better than to hold back.

“I’m sorry,” you murmured. “I didn’t know what I was thinking by defending Toko, of all people. I despise it whenever she insults you.”

“No kidding. It really shows. It always has, which I find pretty attractive.” I nuzzled your cheek. “She doesn’t understand how we feel, babe. Nobody does. Those brats stole everything. Killing them is the only way to save everyone. Don’t you see, _______? We’re one and the same. We both want to see them pay for our suffering. We both want this.”

“We need this,” you said, this time with full conviction. “I...I...”

“Yeah, babe?” My eyes locked on to yours.

“I hate the kids,” you finally confessed, the simmering bitterness and anger coming back to life. “I never stopped hating them. It’s getting harder to hold back all my anger towards them. All I ever think about is revenge, and I just want them to die.”

“Exactly.” Now you were beginning to understand again. “So...are we going to let the kids live and possibly come after us? Do you want to survive for everyone you lost?”

A mixture of anger and sadness dominated your expression as tears brimmed in your eyes. My sympathy for you was undeniably strong. I remembered those early days. The kids brutally murdered everyone you ever knew, leaving you utterly devastated and burning with the same wrath and hatred as me. You wanted them dead, and you sure as hell wouldn’t let them take me away from you. 

“I miss them...I miss them so much...They took away my life. I don’t have anyone now except the survivors...especially you.”

It killed me to see your tears flowing down your dark, but delicate face. Those powerful emotions continued to burn inside you, and they would never stop until your hunger for revenge was fulfilled. To think you were actually showing kindness towards our adversaries. But not anymore.

Keeping you safe in my arms, I kissed away the last of your tears. “The sooner we finish this, the sooner we’ll finally have the life we’ve been dreaming about. I want to be with you forever, but we can’t have that if this keeps up. We have to do whatever it takes to reclaim our home.”

You relaxed in my embrace, sniffling and trying to regain your composure. Neither of us had the will to break the comforting silence, so I just closed my eyes, enjoying these seconds of sweet intimacy.

“We’re breaking the controller.” My eyes opened, and you cast me a stern gaze. “The kids caused all this death and destruction, so let’s show them what we’re made of...by killing them.”

“That’s my girl,” I purred, cupping your chin.

You smiled dreamily at me, your beautiful eyes filled with undying love and devotion. You wrapped your arms around my middle. “I love you, Haiji.”

“I love you too,” I replied, my voice filled with my own love for you. Now there was one thing left to do. “Come on, babe...” I pulled back and grabbed the controller in your hand so that we both held on to it. “Let’s end this nightmare.” I smirked. “Together.”

You nodded, sharing my smirk. “Yes.”

We exchanged glances, and, with all our strength, smashed the controller against the wall. Pieces of the device rained from the impact. The sound of explosions filled the city, one immediately following the other. All the adults rejoiced, and their cheers could be heard even from up here. 

My maniacal laughter echoed in the room as I witnessed the ongoing explosions from afar. Every single kid was finally dead! No more brats to kill any more of us! The Resistance won!

You tackled me with an energetic hug, laughing yourself, but with less insanity. Regardless, you were thrilled about killing the kids. I swept you off your feet, twirling you in the air and bringing you back in my arms. I had never felt this ecstatic in my entire life, and it felt incredible. Holding you captive in my warm embrace, I claimed your lips with a fiery kiss. You surrendered to the passion, stroking my cheek as we quietly celebrated our victory. 

The war was over. We were finally free from this hell, and it was all thanks to the two of us.


End file.
